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dreamprayact

~ Reflections of a preacher, poet, and contemplative activist

dreamprayact

Tag Archives: sorrow

The only thing to do

18 Thursday Feb 2021

Posted by mark lloyd richardson in grief, Reflections

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

death, devotion, grief, loss, sorrow

There is no adequate consolation right now
There is no this is going to get better
There is no lessening of the sorrow
I cannot see the path forward
Only darkness, nothingness
I see no future
No home for me
Not without my beloved
Though I am told there is one

I am also told she lives now in my heart
Or that she lives on in the memories we made
Or that she will always be with me in spirit
None of which is enough right now
I want her
Her body, her mind, her sprightly spirit
Only her presence soothes me
Only she gives a day meaning beyond itself

Being a partner with her in life meant everything
She was my safe harbor in the storm
She knew me better than anyone ever has
She loved me fiercely in spite of my shortcomings
She was protective of me and of our love
She spoke so endearingly to me and about me
In the absence of these, who am I

Most of all she made my heart sing
Especially watching her love this life
A life we were creating together
And seeing her revel in genuine friendships
And laughing with such ease
And appreciating the small gifts hidden within each day
And hearing her tender words to me
And tasting her sweet lips
And feeling her body next to mine
There is no consolation for losing these things
There is no adequate measure to the loss I feel

In the meantime,
I will get up in the mornings as best I can
I will look for life wherever I can find it
If only for you, sweetheart
I will remember our devotion to one another
I will not lose sight of how deeply you loved me
I will grieve, and then grieve some more
It is the only thing to do
It is the only thing
You, Dally, make my heart sing
Though for now the song is awash in tears

~ Mark Lloyd Richardson

With Sighs Too Deep For Words

23 Saturday May 2015

Posted by mark lloyd richardson in Poems, Reflections

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

creation, gladness, grace, intercession, Mystery, prayer, sorrow, spirit, spiritual life

Pentecost Sky

Pentecost Sky

We do not know what we should rightly pray for,
but the spirit intercedes with groans that cannot be uttered,
and he searching our hearts perceives the mind of the spirit,
since as God commands the spirit intercedes to help the saints.
~ Romans 8:26-27

The spirit,
from your first breath,
breathes God’s loving intentions through you.

You,
in your weakness,
don’t know enough to welcome this silent grace.

Your days are littered
with numbed neglect of your soul
and unresponsiveness to the groans of creation.

When you pray
the noises of your mind clamor and disrupt
the stillness where you had hoped to find rest.

Yet below the words
in a deeper, mysterious consciousness
the divine within appeals to the divine above.

There your heart is laid bare,
and with sighs too deep for words
the spirit intercedes to help you find your way.

This day’s sorrow
takes the hand of your heart’s undying gladness
and crosses over into the mystery where hope resides.

Pentecost 2015
Words © 2015 Mark Lloyd Richardson

My Trouble with Seeing

05 Thursday Sep 2013

Posted by mark lloyd richardson in Peace with justice, Poems, Reflections

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Barack Obama, Bashar al-Assad, Middle East, peacemaking, prayer, refugees, shared humanity, sorrow, Syria, United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, violence, war

IMG_1527

A view of Morro Bay from Los Osos, California, USA

I often think about (and pray for) the people suffering in Syria in the confluence of a brutal regime and rebel forces that have various allegiances and motives. The flood of refugees out of Syria grows with each day while the world waits. Thousands of them are children.

I wrote the following piece five years ago, long before Bashar al-Assad, President of Syria, was a household name in the United States (at least for those of us who follow international news). Yet it speaks to me again today.

From a Christian perspective (and I dare say, from the perspective of most religious traditions), this human community in which we live is interconnected in such a way that we feel the suffering of innocents whether we consciously acknowledge the causes or understand the forces at work, many of which are evil.

Here is a poem illuminating how our consciences are stirred by the troubled world in which we live. I am not able to ignore the troubles of others because I feel they are my sisters and brothers regardless of ethnicity, national origin, class, religion, or race.

I pray for them. I pray too for people like me, living in relative comfort. I pray for those who hold the power to act in responsible and humane ways to enlarge the realm of peace and security for all people and to hold accountable anyone who disregards the human bonds we share.

In the end, though, I am left with questions.

My Trouble with Seeing

I will miss this view
when the day comes
and I must go–this panorama
that stretches east and west far beyond
the edges of our wall of windows
on the northern exposure of our home.

There is so much to see each day
that I have trouble seeing it all.
My eyes appear to be open and yet it is only
with great difficulty that I see the neglected
children, the forsaken refugees, the hungry
families, the war-torn lands, on this troubled planet.

There is beauty in these hills I see stretched before me.
Yet what lies beyond them on other hills in other lands?
What sorrows accompany the families of those
whose lives are made brief by the trick of violence?
What misfortunes await the ones whose lives are lived
on the margins from somewhere to nowhere?

Copyright (c) 2008 Mark Lloyd Richardson

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