Blessing for When You Don’t Know Where to Begin

This blessing isn’t sure where to begin.
So many steps are just steps in the dark. 
So much of life is shaped by uncertainty.
So many questions litter our paths.
Where to begin.

Where to begin in mending one’s shattered heart.
Where to begin in creating a life on one’s own.
Where to begin in accepting joy when it comes.
Where to begin.

Even if there are discernible first steps, then what?
At the core of being human the heart beats
with a force originating in the earth’s beginnings
where fire and water and soil and air collide
and explode into wondrous breathtaking life!
Is this the place where healing begins –
as you immerse yourself in this cosmic life force?
If so, where do you learn how to do this?

This blessing sees how often you lose your way
as you unsteadily chart a strange new path alone
without another soul truly able to guide you.
What could anyone possibly say?
They would be trying to piece you back together
into their vision of wholeness.

This blessing admits defeat when necessary.
There is no winning the wrestling match with grief
when it approaches with muscles bulging
and gaze focused squarely on your weaknesses.
It will pin you every time.
Every damn time.

Maybe though, just maybe,
this is precisely what you need –
a sweeping wide-ranging battle to live
with the very things you fear most –
loneliness,
meaninglessness,
being forgotten 
left behind
as the world moves on,
accepting undeserved joy –
as you spar with your muscled opponent
who looks surprisingly familiar,
like someone you’ve encountered before
but haven’t seen in years.

Mark Lloyd Richardson
August 27, 2021
7 months